How time changed my view on being thankful and why forgiving is so important

I took it for granted: that I can walk, talk, laugh, love, have enough food, was cared for, could go to school, meet friends, have people I could trust, have a place I can call  home, live in a save country … I took it for granted, until I was familiarized with the contrary by experiences.

I thought I had plenty of time in my life. I thought I didn’t have to apperceive every second, thought things in that moment weren’t „as“ perfect – until that moment was gone and I couldn’t wish for anything more, than living that moment, again.

I wasn’t implicitly thankful about having a person in my life who was humorous, determined, faithful, loyal, honest, supportive and non-judgmental – until I got badly hurt by experiencing that  person acting completely different.

I wasn’t particularly happy about being able to move freely, whitout any pain, as much as I want – until I someday could’t move how I wanted to.

So, one might think these things are all bad. Experiencing pain, disappointment, fear, rage and heartache. But in fact – no! Experiencing those feelings helped me to be more thankful for the simplest things in my life than I was ever before. They helped me to develop and further evolve my personality. Time helped me.

I had to earn my own money and loose it –  so I could internalize what it means to work hard.
I had to have nobody praising me – so I could learn how to be proud of myself and my achievements.
I had to have times where I hardly caught any sleep cause work was taking over, where I wished for some hours off – to be able to really enjoy when I had free time.

I had to undergo devastating situations – to learn the difference between what actually is devastating and what I thought was devastating , before.

I had to love dearly and be dashed – so I could learn to appreciate what I had.

I had to cry bitterly – so I kew again how amazing it feels to laugh with all my heart.

And the most important experience: I had to learn how to handle the fact that time is limited. That not a single second comes back – even if you waist another hour which won’t come back, reminiscing about a time which won’t come back either. That we all get older. That you are only once 10,16, 18, 20 etc. .That I have to start living even more – right now, right in this very second. That I have to stop not spending precious moments with people I love just because I am too afraid what others think or what the future might hold. 

Thinking about all these things, I also learned a really important thing, which comes hand in hand with the fact that time is limited: forgiving. Learning to forgive and move on is a way of reacting to the fact that time flies. When I realized that we all have too little time, I searched for a way to find a solution for  that issue (which in fact isn’t an issue but the the one factor that makes our live worth living). But actually – there is none. You cannot elongate the time you have, you can just live it as sensible as possible. And you can only do that when you are at peace with yourself –  and others. After spending too much time not being able to overcome my own pride, I finally found that forgiving is a way of handling things which makes me so much happier than being in the right, but after all regretting that I waisted precious lifetime.

I hope you guys could sense what I want to hare with you, even though my thoughts might be a bit all over the place.

Keep smiling and enjoying life

xxx

Helena